August 2009
94 posts
A videotape, a shotgun, a horse and buggery →
Horrible story, amazing headline.
Police Officer Tribute @ AT&T Park
thelongneckgiraffe:
seankeane:
Nice move: The Giants brought out families and colleagues of police officers killed in the line of duty. They had a moment of silence, a helicopter flyover, and a police officer sang the national anthem.
Not-so-nice move: They dressed up mascot Lou Seal in a police uniform and invited him on the field for the ceremony. There’s never a good time for Lou...
July 2009
87 posts
A seven-year-old blog post of mine was the... →
Intro: “If you were a child of the ‘90’s, then Regulate by Warren G and Nate Dogg was probably your jam. Here is a critical analysis of the song by comedian Sean Keane. If only all gangsta rap had such deep meaning”
One of the commentators replied, “‘Comedian’? Really?”
I have never been stung so badly by punctuation before.
However, I am glad...
Kung Fu Dennis
My dad: Don't you think Pablo Sandoal would be better if he lost 20 pounds?
Dad's co-worker: Wouldn't we all?
Police Officer Tribute @ AT&T Park
Nice move: The Giants brought out families and colleagues of police officers killed in the line of duty. They had a moment of silence, a helicopter flyover, and a police officer sang the national anthem.
Not-so-nice move: They dressed up mascot Lou Seal in a police uniform and invited him on the field for the ceremony. There’s never a good time for Lou Seal’s asinine clowning,...
More Depressing Convenience Store Buys
In response to this post:
Jack and I stop to pick up ice cream at a convenience store that, for a moderately-sized corner market, has a staggering selection of Ben & Jerry’s ice cream. My companion nabs his favorite flavor easily, but I have to lunge to reach the Peanut Butter Cup sitting at the bottom of the freezer bin. Staggering selection requires a staggeringly deep freezer bin, I...
I spoke to soon...
Last pre-concert song was actually Elvis Costello: “What’s so funny about Keanes, Love, and Understanding?”
Strippers love the purple onion
The Purple Onion is a great comedy venue, and has been an SF institution for decades. But only in the last week has it had a mascot: a young man dressed as an actual purple onion, walking through North Beach and passing out flyers for the show.
The costume is at once magnificent and completely ridiculous. According to both young men who have donned the costume, it is surprisingly lightweight...
When pandering goes wrong
I was at the Purple Onion this Friday and Saturday. The first show Friday was a benefit for a citizens’ environmental justice group, and also the first time I’ve heard a San Francisco audience boo at a mention of Obama’s name.
At first I thought, was this audience replaced by one from Fresno, or Alabama. Then I realized, they were booing Obama from the left. Take notice: six...
For Sean: "Thirty Reasons Why the Insane Clown... →
(via bfizzle)
16. (6:41) The announcer breaks in, in an apparent attempt to trick the viewer into thinking this is some kind of live broadcast. The “JUST ADDED NOW” list includes MC Chris, some guy from D12 and a dude called, wait for it, Paradime.
Sean Keane and Jay Starr Discuss Juggalos and...
Jay: I didn't think that Juggalos existed outside of the white areas that the government decided it would be OK to let die after Katrina
Sean: I also thought it was just Utah, Arizona, Iowa
Sean: And Mordor
Jay: I think I remember a scene from Fellowship of the Ring where Boromir snuck a look out of a Moria door, grimaced, and said 'They have some Juggalos'
Jay: And a CG Legolas ran around on Shaggy 2 Dope
Sean: haha
Sean: Then Gandalf broke the bridge guarded by Violent J
Sean: But on his way down, Violent J sprayed him with Faygo soda, and Gandalf died
Jay: "YOU SHALL NOT RAP!"
Jay: Is what Gandalf said
“After a girl performed oral sex on me, she said, ‘If my boyfriend knew...”
– Violent J of the Insane Clown Posse, concluding Juggalo Day here at Sean Keane Comedy
only people who know fantasy and omar will get...
Vamsi: i asked bandy if he wanted to trade santana - he said "sure, i'm tanking this year, so how about for a keeper"
Vamsi: so i gave him a list, reluctantly including even my good deals like bj upton and hanson
Vamsi: he asked for pujols
Vamsi: .....
Sean: that's terrible
Vamsi: yes
Sean: and particularly offensive to you
Sean: it's like if you asked Omar to trade you righteous indignation
Vamsi: hahahahahahahahahaha
Mister Softee, or Mister Inspirational?
Max Silvestri: I just got a Mister Softee milkshake
Max Silvestri: just because
Max Silvestri: and then got a little sad, for various reasons, when I finished it in less than a block from the Mister Softee
Max Silvestri: then was relieved
Max Silvestri: to see another empty Mister Softee milkshake cup in the trash
Max Silvestri: in the trashcan at the end of said block
Gabriel Delahaye: hahha
Max Silvestri: someone else took the same journey as me
Gabriel Delahaye: hahaha
Max Silvestri: and came out alright
Violent J on ICP's Bizaar, Bizzar Ride →
Yeah, I guess it’s Juggalo day.
Was there a beginning to that feud? [with Eminem]
There was a lot of his underground stuff of his from back in the day, “fuck ICP/buy my cd” that kind of thing where he’s just going off on us. So on a radio show we did a parody of “My Name Is” and called it “Slim Anus.”
Juggalos: A Wikipedia Perspective
jaystarr:
Aspects
The term originated during a live performance by Insane Clown Posse. During the song “The Juggla”, Bruce addressed the audience as Juggalos, and the positive response resulted in Bruce and Utsler using the word thereafter to refer to themselves and their friends, family, and fans, including other Psychopathic Records artists. Juggalos have compared themselves to a family....
highlights from the 1904 olympics
sportscentr:
indian:
also the ice cream cone was invented
A Cuban postman named Felix Carbajal joined the marathon. He had to run in street clothes that he cut around the legs to make them look like shorts. He stopped off in an orchard en route to have a snack on some apples, which turned out to be rotten. The rotten apples caused him to have to lie down and take a nap. Despite falling ill to...
Goldman Sachs Internal Memo →
By the legendary Farley Katz.
I ask that, in celebrating our raping of the stock market, we show restraint in the following ways:
Please limit high-fives and chest bumps to a dozen a day.
Don’t wear your crowns, except around the office.
Stop paying for things in Monopoly money—I understand it is the same as real money to us, but there have been some complaints.
For now, let’s take down...
Top Earning Comedians List Includes two... →
In addition to the ventriloquists, the list includes two Blue Collar comics, Dane Cook, and Howie Mandel.
WatchAlex Koll fills in as guest host for “The Digg Reel” on Revision3, and totally coincidentally, there’s a plug for Elevator to Space! (Spoiler alert: I get hit in the face.) There’s also air guitar, vodka shots, auto-tune, rubbing alcohol, and the Zapruder film. Check it out.
Sean and Ashley discuss current cinema
Sean: how was "Harry Potter"?
Ashley: we watched Knowing with Nicolas Cage instead
Ashley: his hair is some sort of weird animal
“I’m going to vomit dog shit!”
– One of the many crazy things Richard Simmons yelled at us during his exercise class this morning. (via bestiesonice)
