At the height of the Euro Invasion of the NBA, I developed a theory, primarily inspired by Dirk Novitzki and Andrei Kirilenko. The theory held that European players could be drafted and play in the league, no problem, but for the first five years of their careers, they were forbidden from visiting American barbers. The corollary to this is my Law of Conservation of Yugoslavian Laker Hair (LOCOYLH), which states that the combined hair length of Vladimir Radmanovic and Sasha Vujacic must remain constant. When Sasha decided to grow his hair long this season, Vlad had to get a buzz cut.
Euro baller hairstyles have advanced since the late 90s, and the five-year barber limit no longer seems to holds true. However, Euros still haven’t completely adapted to American basketball in one key area: the high-five. In the above photo, you can see Gasol and Vujacic concentrating intensely, yet still accidentally performing a 1988-Oakland-A’s-style forearm “bash” rather than the intended five. It simply doesn’t come naturally, much less casually.
If you watch the game tonight, watch for Gasol’s furrowed brow and unflinching focus when it comes time to slap some skin.
